The difference between single girls and married girls is more marked than tax brackets and salutations. It's a classic case of "the grass is always greener" I suppose.
Never is this more apparent than during Girls' Night Out festivities. The Mrs./Mommy camp need to escape from desperate housewife-ness to a hotel room and nice restaurant. The Miss contingent often considers a weekend of being at home a nice change from eating out and constant travel.
The Mrs. group wants to trade in yoga pants and carpools for short skirts and sexy boots. The Miss cohort wishes they were at home in yoga pants and flip flops.
The marrieds want to flirt with guys at the bar. The singles know he's most likely (a) married; (b) gay; (c) a commitmentphobe; or (d) a crazy stalker who will incessantly call/text/generally not get the hint after a bad date. Stop questioning our high standards; we're not picky so much as tired of picking out losers.
Somewhere between the first date and the crappily ever after, some married women start to envy the life of the single gal. After all, we don't have to justify how many pair of shoes we own. We can sleep in until noon on the weekends. We don't have to wonder if anyone drank straight out of the milk carton. The toilet seat is always down when we need it. We always have control over the remote.
And yeah, we can go out and party every night. But we don't. Because it's not as much fun when you're alone.
So maybe your husband has gained some weight or lost some hair since you married him. And maybe he's not as romantic as you'd like. But you never have to worry about slipping in the shower and no one finding your body for days. You don't have to skip weddings and other social events because you have no one to be your plus one.
You may love the occasional nights of a bed all to yourself, but you don't have to stress about always sleeping alone. We pay higher taxes. We squash our own bugs. We pay premium to have things shipped that are too heavy for us to carry.
It can be lonely. It can be fabulous. No one liked it enough to put a ring on it, after all. So drink up, married women. Your life isn't so bad.
10 comments:
LOVE, LOVE, LOVE This!!! You forgot the ever present critique that we should meet someone nice "at church." Of course, the suggestion would probably be better received if it wasn't delivered by a married chic who was throwing back shots like they are made of water while wearing pants tighter than any pair of pantyhose I own.
Love your commentary and company. Thanks for both.
I think I blocked that part out, Lori B! I had fun; thanks for being there to commiserate.
I love stalking your blog. I really do.
Well, I sure did get some entertaining texts/messages from the whole ordeal! Love you, LJW.
Glad you enjoyed it, Jen. Say hello to Tiny Eggroll. :)
Tiny Eggroll was too worn out from his excessive clear-heel dancing to come to work today...
Lori...I loved the part about "slipping in the shower and no one finding your body for days!" loved it! Is that strange?!
That's not strange, Tammy. I think about that every time I shower. :)
You're right, you're right. It's just so much more fun to play single when there's nothing on the line!
I'm so right there with you-
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