Today has been one of the hardest days of my career. I know a lot of folks think I have no issue with confrontation (like my pal Susan, who today told me I had "quite a pair"), but it really does bother me to have to deal with difficult people, even when they deserve it.
Every night when I say my prayers before I go to sleep, I spend time thanking God. Thank You for my family. Thank You for my friends. Thank You for having a great house to live in, plenty of food to eat, a good job... I often forget to say thank you to Him for the lessons He's teaching me, because it's so easy to forget that He's in all of it... the good, the bad, the in-between, and in the stinky parts that make us want to crawl under the covers and feel sorry for ourselves.
When we lose someone dear, it's sometimes difficult to see God in it, but He's there. When a child dies, someone who's really a good person loses a job, or a house, or is diagnosed with a terrible disease, I struggle to figure out why. But He's in all of it. Oh, I don't think He causes it, but He uses it... to draw us closer, to reaffirm our dependence on Him, to show His glory.
Last night, when I was reading Beth Moore, I came across this prophetic passage:
"Then comes the question: Will we walk away from Jesus when from human understanding He looks weak and defeated?
What do we do when we can't explain what Jesus is doing?
Will we remain nearby when He hasn't stopped a tragedy?
When based on earthly evidence, human reasoning is left to one of two harrowing conclusions: He is either mean or weak. Think, beloved, about what I'm saying. Will we cling when our human reasoning implies evil has defeated Him? Or that evil seems to be found in Him? Will we stand by faith when human logic says to run?
That's what will make us different."
Ouch. Sometimes when it's hardest to see His hand is when He's working the most. Oh, it's not always easy to trust. But that's how we grow. And how He shines.
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3 comments:
what I really meant to say is that you deal directly with conflict, even though the popular method is to ignore it. ( I really hope that didn't offend you, it was meant as a compliment---nothing less.)
I think you're terrific, LJW.
Oh, DeWood, I was so not offended by that. You know how hard it is to hurt my feelings... especially when it's true.
Or, as Karen Fillipelli would say, "Yeah, I'm the regional manager of the Utica branch. Turns out this job's not so hard when your boss isn't an idiot and your boyfriend isn't in love with someone else." Oh, wait... guess that didn't apply.
What oh what would Jan Levinson do?!?
Thanks Lori! I think we all needed to read that.
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